At the route of Obeyery society is the family. These vary enormously in size, but as a minimum a peasant Obeyery family would typically consist of a dominant male and female with two to three off-spring. As the family moves up in status it tends to add additional layers.
A middle class Obeyery family would typically contain a dominant male, several junior males, several fertile females, and assorted juveniles. Obeyery families tend to be on the extended model. The junior males dwelling with their mates within the family home. The dominant male is normally elected to the position based on deeds, known skill, family needs etc. They remain in this position until they die or voluntarily step down (an unusual occurance.)
A high status family would not only have their own family in the dwelling, but also swarms of servants, oftern with their own families. A sign of status is the ability to support a large household.
The families, through blood ties, form into clans, called Reya. These are the dominant political force on Stave. Through most of history it has been the Reya which have had the highest level of unification. Within each Reya a handfull of families (which families can change from time to time) have the bulk of the political power. Reya occasionly came together for mutual benefit but generally such alliances did not last long.
Historically only twice have the majority of Reya banded together into anything like a single people. Firstly around 622 Basa Lery united the Obeyery under his banner, the Highsun staff, but upon his death the grand alliance fell apart. More recently Velesry Lery using the Highsun staff as his banner has managed to unite the majority of the Reya under his rule. Velesry Lery has been ruthless in putting down opposition, but it appears the results may survive his death and a true united people may emerge.
"Marriage" in a family is at the prerogrative of the dominant male (actually in practice the dominant female suggests potential matches to the family head) and tends to be within the Reya the family is part of. Velesry Lery has forced several major families to arrange matches with members from rival Reya, obviously attempting to weaken the Reya as a political force.
A marriage is also an excuse for a great party, during the celebrations much boasting, and contests of skill take place amongst the males. The females tend to be more into political maneuvering. Preferring perhaps to be the power behind the throne.
Studies of the Obeyery by the Third Imperium have been very brief, the Zhodani have also tended to overlook this race though they have been studying them longer and are the worlds major source of off-world revenue. Much still remains to be learnt.